Why pregnancy feels like a no man’s land (and how it’s actually preparing you for motherhood)
Feeling disconnected during pregnancy? You’re not alone.
For many women, pregnancy is an in-between space. You’re no longer the person you were before, but you’re also not fully a mother yet. The things that used to bring you joy might not hit the same way, and that can feel really unsettling.
I recently received a message from a listener of The Mama Circle Podcast who described this exact feeling. She said:
“I’m here, but not there. I’m grieving who I was before pregnancy. I used to be active, loved running and hiking, and now I can’t do those things. But I also don’t know what to expect on the other side. I feel stuck between my past and the future.”
If this resonates, here’s what I want you to know: This phase is normal, and it’s actually serving a purpose.
Why Pregnancy Feels Like a No Man’s Land
Pregnancy is an initiation into motherhood, and part of that journey involves shedding aspects of your old identity to make space for the new one. Think about it:
Your changing body is preparing you for the physical demands of postpartum. If you suddenly had to stop all your favorite activities overnight because you had a newborn, the adjustment would be even harder.
Your shifting priorities are helping you let go of what no longer serves you. The things that once defined you might take a backseat, and that’s okay. It’s part of the evolution.
Even the discomfort is a lesson in surrender. Pregnancy teaches you to trust the process, to be in the moment, and to accept what is instead of resisting change.
How to Navigate This Transition with More Ease
Acknowledge the grief. It’s okay to mourn your pre-pregnancy self while also being excited for what’s ahead.
Surround yourself with support. Pregnancy isn’t meant to be navigated alone. Lean on women who’ve been there before.
Find small ways to connect with yourself. Even if your usual passions feel out of reach, try micro-moments of joy like listening to a favourite song, journaling, or gentle movement
Remind yourself: This isn’t forever. Pregnancy is a transition, not a permanent state. Your energy, interests, and movement will evolve again.
Next week: We’re diving into matrescence - the full identity shift into motherhood. Make sure you’re subscribed so you don’t miss it!
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